From: Marina Del Rey, California
Monday, 4:05 P.M.

Dear Friend and Speed Seduction Student..

First, let me wish you a Happy and Prosperous 1998 and allow me 
to apologize for my long sabbatical from the newsletter.  I can 
assure you I've been devoting my time to bring Speed Seduction 
along as far as it can go and to make it the most dynamite, 
hands-down practical system for success and power with women 
that the world as ever seen.

In this issue, I'd like to address some of the more common 
challenges that my students and clients have brought to my 
attention over the past year. I think by clearing these up you 
can EXPONENTIALLY increase your Speed Seduction success.
	
First and foremost, I want to talk about some basic concepts 
to get you through the initial learning curve.

Look: I know that Speed Seduction can seem a bit overwhelming 
at first. In fact, I sometimes think I deliver TOO much; you 
really have to immerse yourself in it to absorb it all.

And so the single most important thing I can tell you about 
being successful with Speed Seduction also applies to 
success in virtually ANY new endeavor. And that is...

Don't  Let Your Feelings Determine What Your Vision Will Be!
Listen: recently I was talking with a friend who had been 
feeling down..going through a VERY tough period...and she 
was asking me how I got through my bad times(which have been 
pretty bad and desperate at times...TRUST ME!).

And it occurred to me that everyone has struggles; everyone 
has difficulties, everyone has some real challenges. But those 
who get through it all and make a life for themselves the way 
they want don't let how they feel in the moment determine what 
their vision will be.

Now..don't get me wrong. I'm not saying to ignore the initial 
frustration you might feel when you are first trying SS and 
maybe tripping on your dick or falling on your ass. Or even 
more frustrating, getting some really great responses from 
hot women, but  forgetting or not knowing that last vital step 
to close the deal. We've all been there.

What I am saying is, acknowledge the frustration..or even the 
confusion. But don't make them the deciding factor .

Let me give you a hint about something; we live in a world where 
99% of the population are controlled by their feelings in the 
moment. That means they have little or no discipline. That means 
they have little or no direction or motivation. That means they 
sit around and wait for their feelings to kick them into action. 
That means you can be a zillion times more successful than them 
in ANY area of life if you can just get past this.

Here's my antidote for Speed Seduction(and life) success:

Acknowledge Your Feelings But Act Based On Your Vision Of The 
Way You Want Things To Be And What You Want To Have Happen And 
Develop A Stubborn Refusal To Give Up Until Your External Reality 
Matches That Vision!

A bit more about "stubborn refusals".  You see, sometimes, I think 
being "negative" can work better in the boost phase of a project 
or an endeavor than being positive.

Again..don't get me wrong. Your VISION can and should be positive. 
But as far as feelings go, sometimes what it takes to get started 
is a STUBBORN refusal to accept things as they currently are..to 
be willing to do anything to fight your way out of it and get to 
something better.

As an example from my own life: when I was 19 years old, I was 
still absolutely terrified of women. But I decided that summer..and 
this is really weird..I just decided one afternoon that I would no 
longer be a prisoner of fear. That I didn't care what happened to me 
while I did it or what I had to go through but that I was either 
going to get over my fear of women or die in the attempt.

So that summer I went to the shopping malls..and FORCED myself to 
talk to every woman I saw. I came close to throwing up the first 
2 or 3 dozen times I was so scared. I'm sure I didn't make any 
sense as I blurted out ANYTHING that came to mind. But I was SO 
determined to overcome my fear, I didn't care.

And guess what? After about the 20th woman..a strange feeling 
came over me. A rush of elation..of knowing I had kicked over and 
triumphed over a boundary and barrier that had kept me back! And I 
knew that everytime I fought that barrier..everytime I defied and 
worked and acted against it, I was growing stronger, no matter HOW 
the women happened to respond. I was experiencing the power and 
joy of defining through brave(albeit not very effective) action 
how I wanted to be.

Now..since then I've developed and found MUCH better tools. But that 
willingness to pay the price and the stubborn refusal to stay stuck 
made all the difference in the world.

Which brings me to another vital point. And that is...

Understand And Utilize The Value Of "Willingess" Vs. Will!!

As kids, I think we are often brought up with tales of how our 
parents or grandparents or whoever endured terrible hardships 
and how easy we have it. THEY had to walk miles through the 
snow to get to school, wake up every morning at 3am to milk 
the pigs, and then after school work fifteen hours in the brick 
factory. And when they got home dad would beat them about the 
head and neck with a piece of chicken wire, IF  they were lucky.

And sometimes, we're encultered to believe in this concept of  
"steeling" ourselves against hardship.

I think this concept is often a mistake.

A story to illustrate:  A brave..and I mean VERY brave girl is coming 
to my Los Angeles seminar as a demonstration subject. Now, I met this 
girl at a Silva Mind Control Training being given by my good friend and 
teacher, Dr. John Latourette. And when I called her today to make sure 
she was coming, she said, 

"Well...I don't know. I can get the time off..and I can afford it...but 
frankly...YOU SCARE ME!".

Now, I thought that was pretty ballsy for her to admit that she is 
scared and to be straight with me about it.

But the funny thing is this: she also told me she was scared of Dr. 
Latourette and what HE teaches..that she finds Dr. L(who I admire 
greatly, by the way..don't hurt me, John) frightening, but she 
STILL went to his seminar, because she, truly, truly wants to learn 
what he teaches.

Now, I said to her, "look down at your lap and tell me if you 
see huge brass balls, because YOU'VE got them! To be scared but 
want it badly enough to go anyway is true, true courage!".

So, after discussing me and MY seminar, she's still a little 
frightened of me. But she's coming anyway, and I admire that 
1000%. This girl will go much farther in her life because of 
that quality of willingness; of being open and willing to take 
action even though she's frightened!

My point is this; if you simply open yourself to whatever learnings 
might come your way and whatever initial embarassments or frustrations 
you might experience as you are attaining mastery at SS, you don't 
have to steel yourself like you are about to be in a car accident!

Rather, you can RELAX and accept that it may be tough for a while 
and decide you will push youself through it anyway. Because when 
you relax into it  you'll rocket through the learning curve..

Listen: It may seem like I am harping on this a bit, but it is VERY 
important. Because "will" not only makes things harder, it also tends 
to exaggerate the actual price you have to pay and implies a doubting 
of your ability to take it. In effect, it's an OVERresponse. 
	
Willingness  on the other hand allows you to relax and keep your focus 
during the learning curve. You're not fighting yourself and 
things therefore flow much easier. The learnings come faster 
and above all you get to keep your FOCUS on where you want 
to be!

A Good Practical Exercise For Maintaing Your Vision

I've found that the following meditation REALLY has helped me 
during the toughest times to keep my vision focused on the future!

Sit quietly, and do some deep breathing. If you know some breathing 
disciplines or already know how to do altered state work of some kind, 
go ahead and do it.

Once you reach that altered state, close your eyes and say to 
yourself, "I rise above what others think is possible and enter 
a place where anything can be." As you say that, literally 
visualize yourself rising above the ground and see the city 
beneath you, containing all the limits and limited thinking(including 
what was once your own) down there below. And now from this 
NEW place..this place where anything can be possible..where 
anything can be tried out and anything can be tried on..from THIS 
place, think about how you'd like things to be and what answers you 
can find. From this place set your vision and do your thinking. 
And carry this place with you. Because it's where you DESERVE to 
live from.

And the truth is this: it is ONLY when you live from is place FIRST 
that your external reality will begin to reflect it. The sole trick 
is getting through the lag time between the two! That act of 
discipline, clarity and willingness is the key to getting wherever 
you want to in life!

Ok. Here Are The Specific Speed Seduction Trouble Shooting Tip

Tip 1: The patterns are examples, NOT rules. Many students think 
that unless they present the patterns to women, word for word, 
that they won't work or get results. THIS IS JUST 100% FALSE! The 
patterns are only examples..very GOOD 

examples..of the kinds of communication that turn women on. But 
they aren't meant to be rigidly or exclusively followed.  Learn 
from them HOW they work, and you'll be able to eventually create 
your own patterns.

Tip 2: Women enjoy the patterns, so DON'T worry about being 
caught. So many beginning students feel like they are doing 
something wrong...a small minor crime like picking a pocket or 
stealing a wrist-watch when they approach women to do the patterns!
	
Hey..the patterns are designed to make women feel wonderful! At 
the very least you are  brightening her day and doing her a favor  
and at best turning her on unlike anyone else ever has! So far 
from feeling bad, you ought to excited about the gift you are 
giving her!

Tip 3: Practice the patterns outloud!  The patterns are meant to be 
SPOKEN, not read! You can't really master the tonality and tempo 
unless you practice OUTLOUD! THIS STEP IS CRITICAL!

Tip 4: Take a little bit each day! Speed Seduction is like learning 
a whole new language and a whole new way of thinking! Be fair to 
yourself and don't try to master it all at once! Take your time 
and just do a little bit every day! You'll be shocked at how much 
you master in just a couple of months time!

Tip 5: Pattern Flow Is Important! One of the most crucial skills 
is knowing how to transition from one pattern to the next! In the 
last letter I sent you, I told you how to make flash cards to 
quickly learn how to flow from one pattern to the next! If you 
haven't done that... DO IT NOW! 

Tip 6: Understand The Conversational Set-ups!  Patterns are hard 
to use if you don't know how to introduce them and bring them up 
in conversation! For each pattern you want to use you ought to 
have at least two ways of bringing it up! I cover this in several 
of the Get Laid Newsletters, so if you haven't got them, call 
Yates for your back issues NOW!

Tip 7: Practice Your Closing! So many guys have told me they've 
run patterns but when it comes time to closing the deal..they 
are stuck! Well, as I have said, if you want a result, you 've 
got to rehearse it! So prepare your closes in advance so they 
flow from you naturally and without thought when you need them!

Along those lines, here are some EXCELLENT closes I've come up 
with, with some help from my great students, Brother Orion and 
Brother Kamal(close #3).

Close #1:  Why don't we continue this somewhere else and see 
how much we can enjoy each other's company?

Close #2: It's too bad you're not the type of person who can 
imagine feeling and doing all the things you love to feel and 
do..for all the reasons that make sense to you..but  as you 
think about it just like that..doesn't it just seem that spending 
some time together is something we have to do?

Close #3: So..what steps would we have to take in order to 
make sure we can talk again?

Close #4: I have an intuition..and I don't know if you can 
imagine this as I describe it..that when we get a chance to 
talk without time pressures or interruptions...we'll really 
enjoy each other's company..and I'm wondering if there's a 
number where you feel comfortable having me call you.

---------------------------------------

The Mail Bag

From: XXXX69 
Date: Fri, 9 Jan 1998 23:05:58 EST

NO TECHNIQES BUT A REQUEST FOR SUGGESTIONS 
TO MY UNIQUE SITUATION

Hello Brothers and Brotheretts;

As my prior post said before, I am new to sargying and I consider 
myself to still be in the practice mode.

I am trying to turn a friend who majored in psychology into a lover. 

This is someone that I have known in the latin dance scene.
I met her almost a year ago and just got her number 
but I have talked to her whenever I saw her at the dance clubs.

Before we went dancing, I took her for coffee and we talked.

I established what I thought was rapport and told her about 
my visual intuition about her and her bad habit of making 
pictures when someone was talking to her.(abbreviated pattern 
description because supposedly you know this already)
She did not respond to this or the connection pattern. I tried 
to elicit her values and she fought me on this also. 

Everything I tried she shut me down and was totally 
uncoperative. 

She told me that I sounded insincere and unnatural.  That 
tells me that I need to work on being more natural sounding.  

I considered this practice and as Ross says, "Learn from your 
mistakes, and do not get rattled by setbacks."  

This may be one situation where being myself and not using 
ss may be in order. Personally, I do not like that idea.  If 
anyone has any suggestions besides the obvious of working on 
sounding more natural that would be great.

P.S. For those of you out there who want a learning experience ---->- 
Although I am new to this and I do not know everything,  notice 
that my attitude is still intact and I will continue to move forward 
in my pursuit to master and improve my ss skills.



Dear Brother XXX,

I'm most interested in this chyck's comments that you sounded unnatural.

First, from what you yourself said, you've known her for at 
least a year. So, if you suddenly start talking this way about 
all this stuff it won't match with what she already "knows" 
about you and how you talk.

My suggestion in this type of situation, when you are practicing SS 
with women you already know IS TO USE QUOTES. Take whatever themes 
or patterns you wish to use, and talk about how you learned about 
this in a class or a seminar or a lecture or a tape set. 

That way all the suggestions go in, without her having to worry 
about why you are suddenly talking in ways you never have before. 
Of course you are..you've learned something new! And now here's 
HER chance to open up and listen to you; after all, what person 
wants to be perceived as being against new learnings?

Finally, to the extent that you make the pattern more a reflection 
of your own passions and interests you will have more success in 
conveying a sincere communication rather than reciting rehearsed 
"lines". Remember one of the tips above: the patterns are only 
EXAMPLES and NOT rules. 

Along these lines, as an exercise, why not pick a theme that has 
some deep personal interest for you and also might intrigue women? 
You can then use pieces of the patterning language to come up with 
someone unique for yourself! I'm not looking for robots who recite 
my stuff, but  creative thinkers who can make it even better and 
teach ME how  to "Sargy" even better.

(For those of you who still don't know, "Sargy" is my beautiful 
Russian blue pussy-cat and some of my students have nicknamed 
practicing Speed Seduction after this magnificent feline beast! MEEROW!)

--------------------

(From the SS private email list)

From: SXXXXXX
To: ss@seduction.com
Subject: Healthy judgement...

Hi Ross,

One of my friends has asked me to ask you for advice on what he should do.

I have told him about SS and NLP.  At first, he thought it was
BS and does not work.  By now, he suspects that it works and is not
(all) BS, but is still not willing to use it.  Thus, he is still a nice
guy, and average chump who needs a good advice, otherwise is definitely
going to be frustrated.  :)

He has hung out with this chinese chick for a while after she broke up
with a (chinese) boyfriend about 1 month ago.  I think he is kinda falling
in love and has certainly put a high value on her.  He called her to his
room once and read her A Single Perfect Rose (I managed to convince him of
that) and then told her that he wants to "go out with" her.  She said "It
is not a good time" because she just recently broke up this year-long
relationship.  They have continued to hang out though--study together,
play video games, and other lame-to-do-with-an-HB stuff.  Now he has
invited her for dinner (against my advice), thus putting bunches of eggs
in one basket.  Also he did it over E-mail and is anticipating a response
after she gets back from the holidays.  If she says no, then he won't be
needing advice.

If she says yes, however, he is wondering how he should approach the
dinner, how to act, and whether to make a physical pass (after the
dinner).  I have already given him my $0.02 worth, but he want the advice
of some of the guys (I have been showing him some of the list discussions)
after of course making it clear what the non-disclosure terms are.

He is definitely a guy who can benefit from SS, because now his social
life and (what is worse) his attitude is pathetic.  I have told him about
the basic beliefs, however he has trouble adopting them:

"There are virtually no good-looking and nice chicks at Caltech.  It will
take another 5 freshman classes for me to find another like this one."
was a response to "If I were to tell you that tomorrow you could meet 10
women all better that this one..."

"I am more attracted to this girl than any other girls I've liked.  She
has got just about everything I am looking for.  Hell yeah, I've put a
hell of a lot of importance on her."  was the response to "You are putting
way too much importance on this one chick."

Please let me know what you think so that I can let him know.  Once
again, he trusts my judgement and advice, however, he asked me for the
wisdom of the list as well.  He is unwilling to use pattern and (I am
sure) incapable of mirroring, so it will have to be straightforward pre-SS
stuff.  Thanks

Stefan


Dear Stefan,

Geez, Louise..your friend is making SO many dumb mistakes, I scarely know 
where to begin.
 
First, and most illustrative, Speed Seduction is NOT something that is 
meant to be used to "get dates". Speed Seduction is meant  to REPLACE DATING.

As I tell guys in my seminars, so do I now repeat to you, "DATING IS FOR 
WOMEN YOU ARE ALREADY SLEEPING WITH".

Secondly, he's coming at the whole thing with a poverty/scarcity mentality, 
so OF course he's making mistake number three, which is attaching too 
much meaning to this woman!

Looks to me like whatever advice you give him, he's gonna get clobbered!

It's admirable that you're a good enough pal to tell him about Speed 
Seduction, but I'm afraid he's going to really have to hit bottom before 
he listens! Maybe after this woman has done an ego-dectomy on him, 
he'll be more willing. But if he won't adopt the attitudes or use 
the tools, what can you do?

Look: Speed Seduction is MECHANICS, not MAGIC. If you don't use all the 
elements in the right sequence in the right way, it isn't going to work. 
This guy won't do that so he isn't going to go anywhere with it. Leave 
him to his fate until he decides to come around. Then drag his 
pathetic ass to a seminar!


From: ScottXXXX 
To: "'ross@seduction.com'" 
Subject: internet groups and other items.
Date: Fri, 28 Nov 1997 10:58:50 -0600


You are GOD. Not a god but GOD.  I am a new student and while a still need
a little work on the final close (off).  I can easily say that EVERYONE in
every area of my life is responding to me and a much more positive way. 
Since I began studying speed seduction I have been described as passionate, 
gifted with words, very sexual, spiritually centered, and numerous others.  
I have NEVER been described in such ways!  I can't wait to get really good!

I can't seem to access alt.seduction.fast and would like some help.  Also
how do I find myself setting up an appointment for my consultation as part
of the deluxe package.

Scott XXX
Aspiring Slime Bag


Dear Scott,

Thanks for the kind words. Sargy has asked me to remind you that far from 
being God or a god, I'm merely a fairly useless hu-man who is good for 
cleaning the scat box and working a can opener. If I woke up one morning 
without thumbs or the size of a mouse, he'd gladly kill me if he could.

It's interesting that women are using such terms to describe you as you 
stated in your email. You need to understand that the more you explore 
the themes of seduction and let the patterns become real for you, the more 
terms like "passionate" and "spiritually centered" will become true about 
you and the more your success will increase.

In fact, I would say students go through three stages of Speed Seduction Mastery.

Stage One: memorizing and using memorized patterns, word for word.

Stage Two: learning to use themes that incorporate pieces of the 
pattern language.

Stage Three: learning to use themes that have deep personal meaning for the 
student as well as being intriguing to women and allowing the student 
to use pieces of the pattern language.

Sounds like you aren't far from Stage Three. Hope you get plenty of rest 
and take your vitamins!

As for alt.seduction.fast; I wouldn't concern myself with it. It is 
pretty much a flame fest and spam repository, and there isn't much we can 
do about that. There IS however a private Speed Seduction email list 
that is free for you to participate in.  Email me again for instructions 
on joining. And leave your number and we'll talk about the consultation that 
comes with your purchase the Delux Home Study Course!



					Piece and Peace

					Ross


P.S. Here's my seminar schedule for 1998:
Los Angeles: Jan 30, 31, Feb 1st
Miami Beach: April 17, 18, 19th
Chicago: June 12, 13, 14th
Atlanta: August 7th, 8th, 9th
Las Vegas: September 11, 12, 13th